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Children of divorced parents often don’t like visiting the home of one of the parents. While split family life is seldom easy, there are many things you can do to make things easier on your child and help him or her to be happier with the situation.
Here are a list of suggestions:
· Schedule the visitation switch around an event. For example, have the parent that is to be seeing the child pick the child up from school so that the child does not feel like he or she is choosing a side.
· Don’t speak negatively about the other spouse in the presence of the child. It can be confusing for a child to hear you talk about how bad the other parent is and then have you send him or her off to spend time with that parent. They may also experience guilt when visiting that parent, or interpret some of the bad things you say about the parent as things to be afraid of.
· Communicate with your child. Talk about the situation and find out exactly why he or she doesn’t like visiting you or the other parent and work to address it. You may discover the child simply does not want to miss a TV show, or would rather stay with one parent over the other because one does not have a night-light.
· Spend some time with the child and the spouse together, and don’t argue. This will let the child know that even though you got divorced, neither spouse is bad, and it’s okay to be around either one.
· Do not force your child to deliver your messages to the other spouse. Children should not be asked to relay messages about child support or visitation scheduling. Communicate with the other parent yourself.
· Don’t allow your child to believe that you are lonely when the child is away. Children don’t like to make their parents upset and may resist visiting the other parent for your sake.
· Ensure that the child has his own space at both parents’ households. Children often need a place where they can have some quiet time, and many don’t like sharing living space with parents. It may be necessary to get creative.
Please contact us today for a free consultation with an experienced divorce attorney who can inform you of your options, and legal rights, and help you plan the best course of action.
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