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A retired Oakland judge Roderic Duncan says, “Going to court isn’t efficient. It’s way too costly, it takes too much time of everyone involved, and it creates stress and discord between people,” he said. “If it’s discord between just a husband and wife, that happens. But if there are children, that discord spills over to them and that’s just not fair.
Duncan adds to the increasing number of people who are coming to favor alternatives to contested, in-court divorce proceedings, such as collaborative divorce and mediation.
Duncan contends that traditional divorce tends to bring out the worst in people, and that it ends up costing families way too much, both emotionally and financially.
“When I looked back at it after retirement, it became so clear to me that we created a system where the impetus is to fight and contest and nobody gets the result they want,” said Duncan. “There are so many alternatives available that are better and cheaper and involve so much less stress.”
The Issues
Duncan said four things are on the line in divorces: child custody, the division of assets, child support and alimony. In divorces where these can be decided easily, such as those where there are no children and few joint assets, couples can often work out deals with attorneys.
But when divorcing spouses have a lot of animosity toward each other and there are a lot of contested assets, multiple children, or other serious points of contention, an in-court, contested divorce may be the best option.
Mediated and Collaborative Divorces
Mediators are familiar with family law and can inform divorcing spouses when an unreasonable demand is made before it is rejected by the courts. They can offer excellent advice and provide a forum where divorcing spouses can cooperate to come to the best possible compromises for all involved. And since the spouses reached the agreements together, they are less likely to be unsatisfied with the outcome.
What’s more, for mediation, lawyers often charge hourly rates half as high as they would for trial divorces. A mediated divorce will only take about 8-10 hours total and will usually cost less than $5,000.
Collaborative divorce ($15,000-$30,000) employs one lawyer on each side outside of a court setting and involves meeting out-of-court to settle issues rather than dispute them. This option costs a little more than mediation, but substantially less than a traditional divorce.
Considering divorce? Please contact us today for a free consultation with an experienced family attorney who can answer your questions and help you determine the best way to accomplish your family law-related goals.